Politics of Relationships
by Sheela Mackintosh
by Sheela Mackintosh
Like many professional working mothers today faced with the familiar dilemma of juggling motherhood and a demanding job, lawyer Sheela Mackintosh decided on balance that that she didn’t want to be a ‘supermum’. Instead she wanted to continue wanting the challenge and independence of work without compromising her role as a mother of two young children. She hit upon the idea of Divorce & Family Law Information Service, because it fills a huge necessary gap in the market and allowed her to work while the children are at school.
Divorce& Family Law Information Service is a unique consultation service. Sheela is a matrimonial consultant with extensive family law experience. She started her career as a barrister which was she says ‘intellectually challenging’ but re-trained as a solicitor to have more hands-on contact with people. After working in the City she became partner in a London firm specializing in family law. “During my time in private practice, I observed that many clients often had little or no idea of what divorce involved or its repercussions on the family, before embarking on it, and found themselves on the expensive path of divorce and then regretting it. Unfortunately, once on that path, it is difficult to halt the proceedings.’’
Statistically “one in three marriages in the UK end in divorce’’, and Sheela feel strongly that it is vital for people to be better informed of their rights, options and consequences at the outset, so that they can either prepare for divorce in a more considered manner, and so save on crippling legal costs, or they might seriously reconsider whether divorce is indeed the right way forward.
In short, Sheela offers an alternative to the traditional route of seeing a solicitor when there is relationship or marital strife. As one of her clients put it, ‘‘I was clueless about divorce or who to turn to and Sheela has helped me to understand where I stand but also the full implications, for the sake of my children’’. No doubt we all have friends asking you who, where and how to get help, as they fumble through the yellow pages desperately trying to find the right help.
Interestingly, from her experience Sheela has discovered that, more often than not, people really just need a vital perspective and insight into the consequences of marital and relationship break-ups, before deciding to take that step. Sheela says ‘I provide that important perspective by giving relevant legal and practical information specifically ‘tailormade’ to each person’s own personal situation, as family law is complex and each case very much depends on its own facts’.
Those who decide that divorce or leaving a relationship is the only way forward and decide to involve solicitors in the proceedings, will also undoubtedly benefit from seeing Sheela. Sheela offers a good and clear insight, giving guidance on the difficult decision-making on the way forward eg exploring the possibility of negotiating amicably without involving solicitors and saving legal costs in the long run.
A client of Sheela’s who subsequently decided to use a solicitor for her divorce proceedings said ‘‘I am so glad I saw Sheela first because after talking to her, I felt a lot stronger mentally, emotionally and also physically about dealing with my marriage problems. My solicitor did not give me such a detailed explanation or analysis as Sheela did. Sheela gave me the vital perspective I needed by explaining clearly and in very simple terms, to me, so utterly crucial when one is going through this very traumatic time’’
As a client has put succinctly ‘‘Sheela provides a full ‘birds eye view’ of what divorce entails and she is essentially a user-friendly walking encyclopaedia on the subject’’.
Divorce& Family Law Information Service also extends to cohabiting couples, with or without children, who do not enjoy the same legal rights as a married person.
Another important feature of Divorce& Family Law Information Service includes helping clients identify and obtain other forms of alternative help. ‘‘Clients undergoing great emotional crisis and trauma often cannot always be objective and can at times fail to identify what non-legal help is needed to repair a marriage or improve matters for the family as a whole’ says Sheela. Sheela helps to give clients an objective and independent viewpoint, in areas of their marriage which may need to be addressed. She therefore recommends and refers clients to reputable solicitors and mediators if they decide to go ahead with a divorce, but also to reputable sources of other expert help eg, child psychologists, etc’’.
Sheela’s clients say that they have benefited hugely from using Divorce& Family Law Information Service . ‘‘Sheela is very approachable, with great bedside manner and it is so refreshing to meet her because she is reaching out to help me. I felt very comfortable talking to her about the problems in my marriage which I have not found easy to talk about,’ says another grateful client.
For more information on Divorce& Family Law Information Service , you can visit the www.divorcelawinfo.co.uk . To contact Sheela Mackintosh, you can email her at info@divorcelawinfo.co.uk or contact her on 07799550036.
The New Year is a busy time for family lawyers and 7 January has been dubbed ‘D-Day’, the busiest day of the year for divorce lawyers after the Christmas holidays which can bring great marital strife to many.
Statistically, 500 divorces happen every day in the UK. Most involve conflict, and acrimony. Having witnessed this when practicing as a family lawyer in London, I now champion an amicable and practical strategy for handling every aspect of break-up.
Divorce is life changing. Those contemplating break-up should consider reconciliation through counselling or mediation or a trial separation period.
If divorce is the only ‘way out’, then there are 5 options:
Knowledge gives you power. Before taking the first step, you MUST plan and be prepared. I help you by giving YOU:
I also work with cohabiting couples (i.e. non-married couples), who do not enjoy the same legal rights as a married person and also ‘audit’ cases where people are unhappy with their solicitors.
‘Thank God I saw Sheela at the outset of my divorce. Her clear insight and guidance on difficult issues and help with negotiating the amicable settlement was empowering and was exactly what I needed. She gave me a full ‘birds eye view’ of divorce and such a user-friendly walking encyclopaedia on the subject’’ says Joe Marciano, a grateful client.
Sheela qualified as a barrister and solicitor and practiced law in Central London. She now runs an independent matrimonial consultancy service, Divorce & Family Law Information Service and can be reached on:
Tel: 01494 681279 • Mobile: + 44 7799550036 • Email: sheelamac@divorcelawinfo.co.uk • Website: www.divorcelawinfo.co.uk
Or is it because some of us are smarter and better at having good relationship because we have acquired the right skills and knowledge through watching our parents, relatives, friends do it right?
There is much we need to know and learn about choosing the right person and staying in a relationship. But often, we don’t realise what we need to know and so we don’t realise what we need to learn, know or ask.
Fact
Reality
I have seen many unnecessary break-ups which could have been avoided with good strategies & know-how. Much of our relationship success happens by trial and error as we have never been taught how to do it right. Today relationships face many challenges.
No one is immune from relationship break-up.
Take heart
It is never too late to start refreshing your relationships. Small interventions now can make long term differences.
So join me now, and together let us help each other to have better relationships.
